The Pink Martini (virgin of course)

The words strike me straight through my stomach. I am not a perfect being. I have always walked tall, as though I was a giant and all the people in the world were in my playground. Today, walking home, I looked to the sky only to discover that tall isn't really anything at all. What are the ceilings but captors of our lives? Our world has been built around humans, not the misconception of the giant I am. I am beginning to like the bitterness of the martini. Though I really do want a little sugar in my bowl. I have felt though I am a small adult, I am an adult. Not always brought up in the brightest of lights, a lot of my childhood was dim and dismal. However, I have prevailed, and feel as though it is time to grow up, time to become a full-grown adult. Though I am still quite fond of the flavor of kool-aid, I have grown even fonder of Diet Pepsi, a true adult beverage. I still eat cereal for breakfast, I am maturing slowly, though this progression has been a series of quick pains. I am learning to let go, slow down, take a step back and let the other adults around me shine through my clouds. I am not the forty-foot tall woman as I once thought, I am a measly small adult. All five-foot-four of me. A painful realization this has been. All of the time I spent in my youth trying to build myself up, grow up, and here I am, full-grown and small. This was not what I thought it would be at all. I still panic, but the lessons that are coming with that panic are teaching me to have a picnic in that panic. To not only eat the strawberries but enjoy every last morssel. To not buy the cookies, but to enjoy making them. Slow down. Don't grow so tall.